Everything You Need to Know About Compassion Focused Therapy

Graphic reads A Beginner's Guide to Compassion Focused Therapy

What is Compassion Focused Therapy?

Compassion Focused Therapy, or CFT, is probably one of the most helpful adjuncts I’ve come across in my therapy career. Developed by Professor Paul Gilbert, it’s a psychological therapy which aims to help reduce distress and psychological difficulties while also increasing happiness and wellbeing.

CFT does this by helping people cultivate their compassionate minds. In turn, this allows them to engage with the difficulties they are facing in a wise and helpful way. Ultimately, this approach helps people become more compassionate in three directions. To others, from others and to themselves (self-compassion).

I first learned about this approach when I was training to be a CBT therapist. If I’m being completely honest, I was a little sceptical at first. It felt too pink and fluffy to me! Little did I know, it was probably one of the things I needed most in my life.

I believe one of the reasons I struggled with the concept was that I was still in the military when I trained to be a CBT therapist. Let’s just say compassion wasn’t really in keeping with the culture I was operating in at the time! As well as working in an incredibly tough environment, I think my own self-compassion was probably out of whack. I was able to be compassionate towards other people, but it’s not something I found easy to offer myself. This meant I couldn’t fully see the benefits of developing a compassionate mind and offering therapy through that lens.

Thankfully, later in my career, I started to become aware of the benefits. Some therapists operate entirely within a CFT framework, but for me it’s more of a lens through which I offer therapies such as CBT and EMDR.

How Does It Work?

As I said, CFT focuses on helping people develop their compassionate mind which allows them to approach themselves and life in general in a wise, calm and compassionate way. But what do we mean by ‘compassionate’?

In CFT, compassion is defined as ‘a sensitivity to suffering in self and others, with a commitment to relieve and prevent it.’ One way of understanding this definition is to break it down into its two related but separate parts:

Compassion is being able to notice, engage with, tolerate and understand difficulties, distress or suffering
Compassion is being able to take wise action to manage, reduce, relieve and prevent difficulties, distress or suffering

You might notice compassion isn’t just about being nice and kind. There is plenty of strength and grit within compassion too. Sometimes, being compassionate involves taking ‘wise action’. This can mean doing the hard thing, facing problems, and working to resolve them. Developing self-compassion in therapy can also be quite a challenging experience because it also involves engaging with things that are difficult and painful.

See, compassion isn’t pink and fluffy at all! I was definitely wrong on that front!

Who Can Benefit from CFT?

Compassionate approaches are generally really helpful for people who experience high levels of self-criticism and shame. This is very common with trauma, particularly for people who have experienced difficulties in childhood. As these people move into adulthood, shame and self-blame can show up as self-criticism across multiple areas of life. This can be a barrier to traditional therapy techniques, hence the need for CFT.

Compassionate Minds Beyond Therapy

Developing a compassionate mind isn’t just for people in therapy. It’s a perspective anyone can adopt. Learning more about compassion in my work has changed my approach to everything in life. It determines how I deliver therapy, how I deliver supervision, and how I deliver training. It also determines how I interact with people in the world and how I interact with myself. It’s so much more than a therapeutic approach – it’s an outlook that can be used to help overcome some of the things people are left with after trauma.

Find Out More

If you’re interested in CFT or would like to learn more about how I can help you heal and recover from trauma, please get in touch. I also share lots of mental health education via Instagram.

If you’re a therapist interested in this approach, I am a qualified, trauma informed Clinical Supervisor with experience supporting individuals, groups and trainees. I’m also an EMDR Consultant and Training Facilitator, a BABCP accredited CBT therapist and lecturer and a RN(MH). My supervision style is relaxed, supportive and focussed on providing a safe space to learn and share knowledge. Learn more about my services here and please get in touch to discuss working with me.